So, how do you actually say what you need to say without being over come with guilt? Guilt and worry are part of the confrontation process. You just have to accept that breaking up is a necessary evil, because if you don't go through with it when you know you need to extend the amount of personal space between you and the offending individual, then you are stuck and out of luck.
You you have come to the conclusion that your life will be loads better without this certain used-to-be-special someone. Hey, you gave it your best try, or maybe you didn't, it's just time to go. Some times, we enter into relationships with people who have very obvious character flaws that make them dangerous to be with and sometimes, we love someone who just has a different path than the one we envision for ourselves. So, we find that we must say those dreaded words, "I'm leaving."
Options are:
1. Being with you has meant the world to me and I will always love you. For now, I need to be alone, so I'm leaving this relationship behind.
2. I am unhappy and I refuse to continue to be unhappy, so, bye.
3. This [relationship] doesn't work for me any more. I really love you, but I'm not staying.
You can declare your break up any way you like. These options are just examples, especially if you are concerned about hurting the other person. However, there are a few rules you should absolutely follow:
1. (for good Karma) Don't be cruel.
2. (for self respect) Don't be guilted into thinking you owe any further explanations or justifications for why you are breaking up (explaning won't make things better or easier, or help them to understand that you have made up your mind and you are moving on).
3. Don't change your mind a few days later and fall into that all too common, in-and-out, back-and-forth drama. You are not together for some very valid reasons and giving it another, oh...six tries isn't going to make the reason you parted ways the first time not exist.
Yes, breaking up hurts. Yes, you feel bad about it in the beginning. Yes, having to say the actual words out loud makes you want to avoid the confrontation altogether. But, remember, choosing you and your well-being first is always an excellent move. Your sense of love for life will return and you will relish it. You now have created an opening for something or someone more beautiful to enter. That's a lot worth celebrating. You are worth celebrating.
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